My Negotiated Study Two takes the form of a children's book, which I've produced for the Macmillan Prize. I am passionate about children's illustration and am so fascinated by how a book 'works' as a physical, tangible object. I've thoroughly enjoyed my degree course, but have found myself at times getting swept along in a whirlwind of experimental work- I have been intrigued by so many different styles, different media, different techniques, that I was struggling to complete actual finished artwork within the time allowed. This was becoming a problem. However, I finally had to concentrate and produce some beautiful finished work for this project. It was going to be a challenge!
Initially, I was overwhelmed by the brief. Excited, but daunted. I considered just about every fairytale in existence before being swayed by my love of shoes and deciding on The Elves and the Shoemaker. I have always loved this story, since I was really tiny, and remember being fascinated by one particular pair of shoes featured in one version of the story. I am also passionate about shoes! I love fashion, but I prefere looking at, reading about, drawing it and appreciating it on other people, than wearing it myself...! I dress very simply on the whole, but love the theatre of fashion...I'm just not brave enough to wear anything daring! As such, if I am dressing up, I always choose a simple dress, but I will add drama by choosing really amazing shoes. Christian Louboutin, Manolo Blahnik, Jimmy Choo and Roger Vivier are amongst my favourite shoe designers, although sadly I don't own any of their shoes...! Their creations are more akin to works of art than accessories. They stand alone as beautiful objects. It is this contemporary appreciation of shoes that I wanted to make work about. I looked at a lot of versions of this story, but they were all fairly...dull. Many versions were very traditional, and although that works and the books are successful, I feel that there is a gap in the market for a more contemporary version. I feel that children are interested in aesthetics to a greater extent than we give them credit for. Shoes allow an edge of danger (studded stilettos, anyone?), outweighed by beauty...a bit of unashamed shoe appreciation! As such, I wanted to create a book which revelled in the drama of beautiful shoes, and which lent a contemporary edge to this story.
I began by trawling magazines and fashion blogs. I'd peruse shoe shops. I'd stare, without any qualms at all, at women's feet...Liverpudlian women seem to have the best-dressed feet! I'd collage shoes, sketch them, dream about them. But then I actually had to start planning the book! My head was constantly spinning with shoe designs. Wedges. Stilettos. Boots. Block heels. Ankle straps. I was obsessed! It required a lot of discipline to actually sit and plan out a story with a discernible narrative and good pace and flow. I have worked tirelessly on this book. I produced endless composition ideas. Countless roughs. I really thought I was getting somewhere....but then Yadzia (my tutor) suggested that I reduced the size I was working to. This meant completely starting again! I did as she suggested, producing roughs for a teeny-tiny book. I am very heavily influenced by Sara Midda, and I drew up designs for a book which is similar in format to Midda's Sketchbook of Southern France. However, I just wasn't comfortable with the work. I just wasn't working to the same standard as ususal and, although some of the compositions were pleasing, it just didn't feel like 'me'. My quality of line is unusual and is a feature of my work, it is heavy in places, lighter in others, and is useful for emphasis. However, this was lost completely on smaller work. I had to go back to the drawing board. Literally.
Weeks passed by in a haze of roughs, magazines, tears (!), coffee and....shoes. I have worked tirelessly! I was so frustrated though. I was working and working but not getting anywhere. I really wondered if I'd ever see my ideas come to fruition! Eventually, I reached a point where something clicked. I found that one of my problems had been trying to be too realistic in the way I was drawing women. I have always doodled gorgeous women, wearing outlandish clothes more akin to costume than to normal clothing. However, as ever, I tensed up when it came to producing finished artwork...the women were stiff, heavy, frumpy. The dog looked like he was on wheels! I was advised to forget about calves, ankles and knees for the time being, and just to concentrate on drawing long, supermodel legs. When I look in the mirror, my own legs are short and a bit dumpy, so I think I was drawing what I am most familiar with! I loosened up, and allowed the women to become longer, thinner and just more beautiful. It began to work. I started experimenting with gorgeous stockings, suspenders (perhaps not entirely suitable for a children's book but certainly lovely to design!), pairing elaborate boots with stripy tights, fancy dresses with fun leggings and ankle boots. This was the bit I had been looking forward to!
Once I had the drawings ready and finalised, next came colour. Colour is always challenging. I love watercolour and knew all along that Iwould use watercolour to produce the final artwork. I decided to experiment with complimentary colours, and with challenging the rules of colour. I paired yellow with purple. It worked! I experimented with different methods of applying the paint, a big brush, a small brush, sprinkling salt on wet paint. The results were lovely. Painting the buildings in the book proved a challenge. How to avoid a coastal theme? How to create an imaginary feel which stays out of the realm of the fantastic? I decided on tall, thin shapes (to echo the shapes of the women), and on pale green and grey hues. I picked out important details in the windows with jewel-like shade such as fuschia and emerald green.
I very traditional in my approach to my working method. I avoid computers where possible and would rather huddle over a lightbox for hours than admit that Photoshop could do the job ten times faster for me....! The fun for me is in splashing the paint onto the paper, seeing how sits, if it travels, how it dries. As such, I spent hours having a fantastic time painting, but was becoming more and more apprehensive about executing a final book. I regret the fact that I have shied away from computers for so long. Out of fear I have avoided them, and have created work and stress for myself. I had to venture down to the hub to teach myself InDesign....
The final stages of creating the book took me one week from start to finish. Within a week I had scanned everything in (a huge ordeal for me!), altered some of the images using Photoshop, arranged them in InDesign and added the text, printed all of the final pages, and made the book into an actual hardback book. I'm so proud of it! My fear of using technology hasn't been cured, but there has to be a first time for everything, and now I am, at least, a little less afraid. It took a huge amount of patience and some more tears, but the pride when I printed the final page was overwhelming!
This project has proven a huge learning curve for me. It is definitely the one which I have learnt the most from. It has challenged and stretched me beyond any other brief. I'm so glad I was finally forced to produce a whole book. I have now seen the process from start to finish and have a far greater understanding of the way a book is put together. I have learnt a lot about time management and about developing myself as an autonomous learner. I learnt to trust my own judgement, and if I felt an idea was strong, just to follow it. It has been a long and exhausting process, but I am really delighted with the way the book looks. Of course there are parts I'd like to change but on the whole I feel I achieved what I set out to achieve, and have a final book to be proud of.
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